you're only as free as the Law says you are. And Privileged? hahaha How bittersweet growing up in America is. Vote for change Vote for democracy Vote for liberty I would love, and cry with pure joy to see our collective vision of free will. Though it won't happen, it cannot happen, unless every last one of us rises uniformly, unyielding, and wielding a cause. Or would we rather work, numb, work, numb, work numb work numb 'cos we have our mouths to feed, bills to pay, and beers to drink? 'Cos life goes on and on and we all work so hard and so very, very much I can't be the only one: I want my summer vacations back, even though it doesn't work like that here. No, we don't demand long breaks for our backbreaking, red, white, and blue collared ...slaves. Not in our by-the-people-for-the-people government. We don't get to smoke joints without fear of our police state, we just get weekends long enough to breathe, so that we may continue submerged beneath our day in, day out day in day out day in day out oceans of day in day out- every four years, then repeat You can label me a cynic. You can sling words like 'pessimist'- people that don't even know me tell me I should be thankful, grateful, and humble. They tell me that Others have died so that I may live. But what good are those deaths, no, what good is ANY death when tyranny masks itself with patriotism, keeping our jails and taverns rampant with the drunk, dumb, and gullible? You’re only as free as the law says you are And how bittersweet, growing up in America is

I’m a reasonable guy I’m just clickclickclicking away Facebook And other dot coms To satisfy my hunger for The terminal connection Of this social media thing and it takes it’s toll- But trust me, you’d like me in a real life. me and my friends? We’re full size adults all grown up- tattoos and beards, tattoos and bears that can drink beer! and stay up late because life is a party life is a house show and we’re all bros. and we won’t take your shit your friendship your friend shit nothing., we’re cyber hunting - we have google earth and we’re not afraid to use it will our timeless, aged, carved, wood ship of the sea, bound by the earth, tear space/time without any explanation, wormhole'd or whatever, in acceleration beyond imagination, and literally (deliberately) devour, destroy, dissipate, or dare i drone (on)... dominate one or one hundred hallucinations, shared, compressed concentrations that divvy an apparition, a fallacy, of indirect intention, or misguided direction? honestly, who knows really? inward despair can manifest and rear it's cowardly, longing head, horns and all, even here, clinging on to churning, lonely, boiling oceans. we can all relate- we're all already covered in the same dirt, burning, fuming, and working under the same sun the same the same the same life. death. song. poem. Collective. Friendship. Thee friend ship We won’t let you get away with this No no We are too proud and too loud And our riffs are too metal and our weed is too dank To just Take a joke Not from a girl. Not from one. Single. Girl. it's our lucky day- saying 'hello goodbye' and stepping oh so carefully you'd think we were on something besides eggshells our chosen leaders are veterans- they wield righteous ink and they speak in the tongue of cookie monsters and whatever else makes money We are the scene And this is our city.

I find, truthfully if you stare at the ceiling for eight and a half hours a night you begin to fear it. Now I night pine for day time. I want which I lack: day dreams, sunrise & sunshine, I want to be missed, loved, and endless companionship. I just want, want, & want; more, more, & more. Though will I give? Have I? Do I ever? Maybe, maybe not. I couldn't tell you anymore. I couldn't even tell you about my dreams. I couldn't describe or paint it out for you if I dream of blonde, golden locks or of diamond, crystal clear, sapphire sky blue, hazel sea green, straight or straightened redheaded brunettes and bedroom eyes, at once shining and reflective of nighttime gothic black, refracting the fickle moonlight of punk rock fashion, or slow motion indie summer dances, like Indian rain showering through my Autumn Melancholy, or even of naturally occurring, undyed prep student beauty with religious-republican parents. Like someone I could trust. But does Religion produce honesty, or just blinding ignorance and binding, willful faith? Am I really alone in a massive expanse of universe void of the logic, reason, and rational thought? And what of this model girl I maybe, may have long ago dreamt of? Or just dreamt UP? That was when I dreamt, when I slept... Because I don't. Some people, they say they have insomnia, at first I laugh, stumble, choke on my words, then gasp, "Have you yet lost track of sheep? Or have you tried dogs, cats, or frogs? Does your mind allow it, or do you just have the internet? Do you torrent? Do you Reddit? Pintrest hashtag and instagram? Do you like, status, update, ignore, app, request, and flag the inappropriate? Can you find my empty, ghost town pages? Can you even see me up this close or am I blurred through the kaleidoscope of poetry? Because we are here for poetry, right? Well, I'm doing my best. As if that were ever good enough. This time I have eight and a half hours over & over & over walls to count the cracks in tiles to multiply and summarize to make some up. To memorize? Weeks, maybe months. To look down the barrel of federal guns and see YEARS is ultimately both humiliating and humbling. but to deliver said poetry? Mere minutes. Before I disappear again Because minutes? Minutes I took for granted like all other time, in here minutes are asleep. Nothing passes. No time, no privacy- I took privacy for granted and healthy arms and dreams unlocked doors Tylenol PM barefoot showers peace & quiet a full stomach fresh cool air long walks on tired feet I took for granted the loving, clammy clasped sweaty sticky fingers and their future plans the scent and essence of ivory and dove soaps, blended down bare backs milky, silky coconut conditioner sleeping in and IN the dark full lips and quivering orifice a wide open orchid the delicious spit of a lover sour tongue in cheeks, sharing, swapping rich fluid I took for granted And breezy mountain trails colored, tanned, sun soaked, dying October leaves fresh lemon basil pine and grass and raw soil jungle gardens and wild backyards the boom, boom, BOOM of long bassy canyon drives ripped fording the curving, undeveloped roads afternoon mountain air through morning hair I took for granted Stained street lamps by night crooked sidewalks by day birds chirping singing love songs to cars passing the sound of friends laughing horns honking chasing a crazy ball down the street through dirty gutters and tar patched black top I took for granted Wind chimes open, CLEAR windows singing along to the MUSIC of life and toking - maybe even ghosting too big of a hit at the summit with your best friend I took for granted presenting discord speaking up speaking OUT voicing dissonance denying faith openly, unafraid escaping persecution shouting obscenities to authoritative figures and giving the finger to our figurative leadership! seeing change, up close, blurred through the kaleidoscope of democracy! I took for granted being alive and well I took for granted freedom and liberty Now I get to drink a little too much water and breathe the salty stale air alone and awake into and through all the hours of the colossal night " 8 and half hours To think about what I done And what I done wrong. So here's a toast- to all those that roast on the inside with me- and to the (not so) innocent millions passing by- my plastic sippy cup is raised still- no one thinks of us but we're here waiting starving rotting locked on the inside

your shadow was once a puddle: a third dimension for the otherwise ...overbearing ground upon which it stretches the world stands still except for the dogs on my heel, their tongues savagely lashing like the yellowed words flowing from behind your angry teeth. seething higher and higher you no longer ride a horse, but a mechanical psychiatrist i can still hear you over the canyons being carved of self help catalogs on all the plastic platter, paper plates, or whatever whether it is real or hopeless romance i never quote my mother or father i methodically give my pulp for no favor, praise, or fear because that, dear, is exactly what love is not no, in the daunting, dire, distinguished face of rejection, trial, and tribulation it practically hovers, unwavering and unafraid to be alone bloody ochre red dirt stains between the (trembling) legs- drying up and clearly cracking like bleached, boiled bones tight as sun worn leather peeling back the hungry dark, black ceiling of the night- to swish, swallow and spit up my aching heart- the eternal anvil i now wear a jacket of flies, i breathe their maggots and sigh in relief at the sight of death- the foreign, alien exchange of beautiful elements for peace that our love was at once no more than venom- a poison circling our renovated veins, bound for, but lost hopelessly for the blacksmith heart no longer musical, struck no more bloated from the edges to the core and soaked with sticky lies- our greedy paws stuck caught in the honey pot all over again clouds haunt the setting sun. this dusk a juggernaut haze rich in oxygen hydrogen nitrogen ...ozone bacteria- not empty, never alone. pole to pole the machine work frame of atmosphere- a shield from the vacuum of space and solar poison. its ink burns red ocher rust a scar for the skin, a tattoo of the crust. the mantle and mountains crown, a crimson hook of an awful, broken ghost. Carpe Noctem- for the day is too bright swallowed up by the sun too hot for too long. the dark hides the madness of hollow, sunken eyes. it coats the sleeping mud. it breeds the nocturnal vampire youth of the city- bearing the sickle of the grotesque mascara. oh yes, the night rings criminal. wide awake its ivory tendons thin from the dope, pull the barren fiends to the macabre streets. they drink their own weight in blood and lust from the skulls of sacrificial crooked kids and the dying broken beggars. down the gutter and river of tar, asphalt, and dirt, the corpses grind- bloated and moon bleached, they split wide. gums picked clean. the approaching frenzied locust-like hum of your heart ...rings housed deep in porcelain cage bound by fiber, sinew, and fleshy skin stretched tightly over elegant calcium frame i barely comprehend the efforts of every frantic, shivering atom that brought me to you and i can think of nothing else swapping rich fluid and hued gifts while our critics helplessly read-- we used to share Love we used to trade Poetry exchanging foreign intimacy deeper than fucking puddles like i always said blood can be thick but the mud of us is thicker denser with our standing water i take you through sips and tiny pulls to pace, to refuse the utter plastering nighttime visits of your comatose drift and varicose sleep simple stylized structured stanzas are eclipsed and skewed by the vampire novel of you: countless pages and growing you could wash up on shores and still be dry

Homosexuals should have the same rights as heterosexuals They don’t and there is a movement taking place that isn't fully placing the blame where it should fall: Squarely on the shoulders of any organized religion, religious dogma, or “holy scripture” that strictly forbids homosexuality. I want to see these things happen because as humans we are equals. We should all have the same chance at the same things, and there should be no prejudice for any of the differing attributes we may have. Human rights everywhere are infringed upon by religious dogma. Politics should be secular. The laws that affect all of us should be free of any religious influence or interest. They clearly are not. In America, the Christian Right has a far, heavy handed reach into public policies. It is considered political suicide to be atheist. To be in politics in the united states, you must believe in God. Education standards need to be raised. Students should be taught to think for themselves and how to think critically. These kinds of classes need to be standard curriculum. Intelligent design and creationism need to be thrown out the window entirely. Sexual education should be a non-issue. And if they want, yes people should be able to practice their religion, so long as it doesn't affect those incapable of deciding for themselves, or anyone else. But as it currently stands, it does affect those incapable of deciding for themselves, as well as the rest of us. If you don't believe me- Well, good. You should research it for yourself. Something a religion would never recommend. All my life I've always heard: “Be the change you want to see.” Well I want to see childhood indoctrination abolished. I want to see children be taught how to think for themselves, rather than what to think. Questioning my own beliefs is what put me on the path of education. But the path is filled with obstacles, some of them in violent opposition to the goals. One thing I realized is that while atheism has very little to do with my stance on religious practice, it is that very label that puts me at a disadvantage. The majority of people see atheists as arrogant, rude, and unwarranted in their anger. Though I ask you, are we? The answer is a firm, resounding no. We witness religious practice and its influence on education, children, the treatment of women and women’s rights. We see violence every single day that is a direct result of disagreeing about God. Folks will often claim, “Well my religion isn't violent!” And while that may or may not be true, their religion is a product of the problem, and it harbors those that would commit atrocities in the name of their god. By what standards do we pick which religions are “right” and which are “wrong”? Do we cherry pick from the Holy Bible? Do we merely allow intolerance for other faiths and “blasphemy” from the notoriously violent religion of Islam? Religious practice in all forms must be considered, the root of which all contain something fundamentally wrong and backwards: That faith is a virtue. Yes, there are “good” things in “holy books”- but for every good one you can show me, I can probably show you two bad ones. What do we do with the commandments to rape and murder? Just toss them out? Well as you can see, that doesn’t jive with the religious extremists all over the planet. Muslim and Christian extremists alike- so very, very many of them justify killing in the name of their GOD. For a lack of better words- bullshit. So as long as it is bad, who teaches those kids to ignore them? Extremists don’t. Extremists exist because extremists keep breeding them, using their Holy Books as their source and justification. They are not insane! They believe that what they are doing is good and right and just! Ask any extremist that hates “fags” or “womens rights” why. They’ll tell you “because God commands it!” It is the moderates that change the books! The fundamentalists are the ones that follow them literally! And for every atheist you can show me that has committed mass murder, I will show you many, many more religious people that have killed in the name of God. You can directly attribute so many of the murders in the name of God not to “illiterate ignorance” but to “holy men” that are absolutely literate and probably very intelligent! While religion is not the only problem our society and planet faces, it IS one of the biggest- and in so many ways. Religion has had its place and role in the evolution of humans. It has been helpful at times and served a purpose. Religion gave answers to questions long before science was able to figure them out- but that is exactly what modern science and technology and medicine has done- We have a VASTLY greater understanding the fundamental aspects of reality than at any other time in human history (spanning over 100,000 years)- We have mapped the human genome, we have launched satellites into space, we are exploring our solar system and beyond, we have an understanding of how the universe formed, when it formed, and what is going to happen to it in the future. We have an understanding of how life evolved and what humans are. We have made cell phones and computers and the internet and we have connected the entire planet through the use of social networking. Did religion do any of this? NO! for thousands of years it just proclaimed “GOD DID IT! That’s the END! NOW HAVE FAITH AND BE OBEDIENT!” while skeptics and scientists and free thinkers figured things out in the back ground. We have SCIENCE to thank for almost every single advancement that the human race has seen. And now religions are just doing the same thing still in the face of current evidence to the contrary- I know I am generalizing and lumping all religions together in what I am arguing, but I am only doing it for simplicity and because its largely the truth. You can argue “well my religion doesn’t do that” or “they aren’t a true Christian if they do or say this or that”, but those arguments are logical fallacies and have been debunked over and over again. if you can't decide if you're atheist or christian... no big deal! but i would recommend asking yourself questions and thinking on the answers critically- what is reality? what exactly is evidence? if you use the scientific method and think critically in all things, you will find that the more you learn, the more there is to learn! i'm not trying to tell you what to do... that's up to you. live your life as you see fit. but if you wonder if there is a god... don't be afraid to search for the answers- pretty much any atheist will tell you that they are atheist because they did some research and found there is no evidence whatsoever to support the idea of god(s). humans have been making them up for thousands of years- christianity is relatively young when you look at human history. it sprang up as a monotheism of worshiping Yahweh only within the last two and a half thousand years (or so, give or take). but modern humans evolved over 100,000 years ago (we have evidence of this), and only in the last ten thousand years have invented things like agriculture and forms of government. humanity NEEDS critical thinking and intellectual integrity- religion suppresses both of those. almost every religion will tell you to just "have faith". All children of religious parents are taught this. This is teaching children what to think. It is teaching children to be satisfied with ignorance. I now witness this broadly and first hand. It angers me, and I feel like something needs to happen. The majority of parents are instilling the fear of God in their children. It can absolutely be psychologically damaging to young and older minds alike. It is a form of abuse and simultaneously a breeding ground for ignorance, bigotry, and intolerance. Children everywhere, not just in the Bible Belt or Utah, are being blindfolded from infancy. I am writing and arguing on behalf of them. They are too young to know what’s going on. They should not be abused, psychologically, mentally, or physically. They should not be indoctrinated. They should not be subjected to guilt over the vengeful eye of the Lord. They’re children, and they've done nothing wrong.